Have the courage to live a life true to yourself (…).
November (or this whole year) is quite a harsh month for a lot of people, including me. A lot of my friends have had some very difficult times lately and at some point I didn’t know what to do or how to help anymore.
So I focused on the question “What do I and others need to remember, when we am not at our best?”
And here are some answers:
1. It’s OK not to be always OK
I guess this has to do a lot with unrealistic expectations. When we are not feeling ok, we tend to feel worse by beating ourselves up for having a problem and feeling unable to cope with it. Always remember that crisis times help us move forward. There is no progress without a crisis.
2. We are not alone
We don’t have to carry the weight of the world by ourselves. We have a lot of people who care about us and are willing to help us thorough any kind of problem. I used to prefer dealing with everything by myself, but at some point that was just not possible anymore. So I had to accept that asking for help is a sign of mature thinking.
3. We have to let go of blame
Usually when we are facing problems, we tend to blame ourselves or others for our circumstances. We can express anger or frustration at first, but continuing on this path wastes our energy. It’s important to seek for solutions instead of assigning blames.
4. Nothing lasts forever, not even sorrow!
During difficult times, we feel like they are going to continue forever. But, as you well know, not even the worse feelings or situations will last forever. You and I have been through rough times before, and here we are. Alive and kicking once again! So cheer up! This will end, sooner or later. Be patient.
5. Have a plan & take things step by step
Complex and confusing feelings are quite common while dealing with harsh moments. We may also feel unable to make decisions, but it’s important to understand that we are not required to solve everything at once. We should have a plan (if possible) on how to deal with our problems. So just do the next thing on your list and you will be one step ahead.
6. “What doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger”
We are brave! Problems require courage. And courage is not the absence of fear, but taking action despite fear! So don’t feel weak and scared. It takes time.
7. Be kind to yourself
Tough times are easier when we are kind to ourselves. It’s useless beating ourselves up or not allowing ourselves a minute to reprieve from what we are dealing with. This doesn’t mean that we don’t have to take responsibility, it just means that we must have some “time off” the issue and have a laugh, have a treat or surround ourselves with good and joyful people. Recharge your batteries and you will be able to deal with everything!
This is a list of things that came to my mind. Always tell your friends “I’m here for you.” Don’t underestimate the power of such a phrase, because letting know our dear ones that we are supporting them, listening to their feelings, drying their tears, being around and also having a laugh, can mean everything to someone going through hell.
Make a difference in your loved one’s lives and let me know what you have in mind.
Cheers! 🙂
Photo credit: Karl Heinz
